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A wonderful book for anyone with questions about divorce - written by Alex Robboy's mother   :)

How to have good sex

Past Tips

 
Welcome To How To Have Good Sex 

  1. What is this thing, we call ‘Sexual Pleasuring’? Answer
  2. Why Use the Term ‘Sexual Pleasuring’? Answer
  3. Why Should We Talk About Sexual Pleasuring? Answer
  4. What Theoretical Model of Sexual Pleasuring Will Be Taught and Why? Answer
  5. Why Does the Acceptance of Sexual Pleasuring Feel so Awkward? Answer
  6. Are There Any Rules to Feeling Sensual / Sexual Pleasure? Answer
  7. How Does Accurate Sex Information Enhance an Individual’s Experience of Sexual Pleasuring? Answer
  8. What is the Educational Philosophy of Howtohavegoodsex? Answer
  9. The Internet as a medium for sex education? Answer

 

 

Distance Learning is an exciting new way for people, much like yourself to learn about Sexual Pleasuring Techniques.   (Please scroll down to the bottom of the page for the 101 description of distance learning for sex crazed computer illiterates)

If you are interested in taking one of our 10 classes, please write to Alex at alex@howtohavegoodsex.com and let her know which class you would like to attend.  Our next series of classes will not begin until January 2002.

  1. Class # 1 Overview & Communication Issues
  2. Class # 2 Sexual Development
  3. Class # 3 Getting to know ones own body
  4. Class # 4 Learning to listen to your partners verbal and non verbal cues
  5. Class # 5 Teaching a partner about ones own body
  6. Class # 6 Switching roles
  7. Class # 7 Orgasm
  8. Class # 8 Play Time
  9. Class # 9 Intimacy
  10. Class # 10 Questions & Answers

(Scroll down for the answers)

Class # 1 Overview & Communication Issues

This class will provide students with a basic overview of what they will gain and can expect from a Sexual Pleasuring Class. First students will be introduced to the format of a teleconference course and how to use it. Second, ‘safety’ guidelines will be developed. Third, the focus of this class will be on peoples communication styles and how to begin talking with a partner about sexual feelings, desires and wants.  Good communication is one of the most important aspects of sexual pleasuring.   Often it is not enough to know what your own likes or dislikes are, it’s about how to teach someone else how to please you, or to discover how to please someone else, both emotionally and physically.  Good communication can resolve about 80% of all sexual problems. The other 20% usually entails having access to sex-related knowledge. For example, a common side effect a person taking Prozac might experience is  a decreased libido.  This is a result of the medication, not the relationship.  Without this piece of knowledge, miscommunication is likely to result. In this class, students will learn how to:

  1. Ask open-ended questions
  2. Summarize the other person’s perspective
  3. Validate a person’s feelings
  4. Share their feelings with someone else

Class # 2 Sexual Development

This class, having already established the basic format of the class and begun the joining process. This class is designed to help student identify where they are at in their own sexual orientation development process. The primary questions that students will be able to answer at end of class are:

  1. How do they express their sexuality?
  2. How did they learned what they learned?
  3. Identify two ways that their environment influenced them?

Class # 3 Getting to know ones own body

This class focuses on getting to know ones own body. The specific areas of focus on an exploration of how people like to be touched. A sharing of sensations that people find pleasurable. Types of activities that make people feel embarrassed. What makes people know what they know? And how the learning process changes when they are alone or with a partner? In addition, this class will provide students with exercises, which they continue with at home for their own enhancement of getting familiar with their body.

Class # 4 Learning to listen to your partners verbal and non verbal cues

This class focuses on communication learning how to listen to a partner’s verbal cues and listening to a partner’s non-verbal cues. Often times in a sexual situation people have difficulty verbally expressing their likes, dislikes and needs, therefore actual listening skills require an ability to recognize verbal and non verbal cues and how to ask a partner for clarification when the cues are conflicting.

Class # 5 Teaching a partner about ones own body

Part of good sex is learning how to teach someone about ones own body. This class focuses on making you the expert of your own body. Therefore, you are the teacher. As a teacher, you may benefit from some teaching techniques, but all the answers lye from within. In this class, students will learn how to teach their partner about their own body. In class, they will learn an adaptation of part of the sensate focus exercises. Furthermore, by the end of class students will be able to identify several different ways that they could share with someone how they like to be touched and held. In classes, students will also be asked to explore what some of the common issues are that prevents them from sharing this information and how to overcome them.

Class # 6 Switching roles

In this class students will be asked to track what types of ‘role’ they usually play (are they aggressive/passive, student/teacher, equals, demanding/easy-going, or shy/uninhibited). Then students will learn different ways in which they could alter the role that they usually play, and explore what types of changes would be required so that they could accomplish this task.

Class # 7 Orgasm

This class focuses on the ‘release’ of sexual energy, otherwise known as ‘orgasm’. By the end of class students will be able to recognize when they are having an orgasm, what the stages of sexual excitement are, and how each of them can enhance the orgasms that they are currently having. Furthermore, this class will explore what other signs they could look for to help them evaluate if ‘sex is good’. Not all ‘good’ sex ends up with orgasm.

Class # 8 Play Time

This class is designed to teach students how to make sex fun again.  Class focuses on how relearning how to play and what ways play can be incorporated into sex. Play is extremely important. Through play, many people are able to express themselves in ways that words can not describe.

Class # 9 Intimacy

This class will focus on how sexuality can enhance the intimacy level between two (and even three) people. By the end of you class, you will be able to identify how sexual pleasuring is a personal issue for you and ways in which you can improve your ability to openly express to others your feelings.

Class # 10 Questions & Answers

This class is designed to answer all the lingering questions which you harbor, and have not been able to find an avenue to answer.  In order to ensure that your question is addressed and answered, it is helpful if you e-mail your question ahead of time to alex@howtohavegoodsex.com If you do not wish to send in your question ahead of time, chances are that we will still be able to answer it. Usually, this class is pretty small, which enables a richer discussion to emerge.

 

 

Our Favorite Dating site 

Adultfriendfinder is my favorite internet dating site

                                                              

Our Favorite Sex Education Books

The Joy of Self Pleasuring Sex Positions The Joy of Sex Urge: Hot Secrets for Great Sex
101 Nights of Grrreat Sex: The Hot Guide to Safer Sex
For Yourself Sex For One
Psychology Today Here to Help: Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy

Our Favorite Sex Toys

 Fun gag gifts

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The Founder: Alex Robboy, LCSW, QSW, CAS
Alex Robboy is a certified sex therapist through the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists and an American Board Certified Sexologist. In addition, she is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists.

 

  Our Philosophy sex is like dancing, it changes every time. It depends on culture, atmosphere and mood. Sometimes it is done alone, with a partner or in a group. It can be fast and hard or slow and soft. Sex is a combination of non-verbal negotiation and verbal cues: a scream, a twitch of the toes, or a flush of the face. There is no one 'right' way to move, only what feels good to all those involved. 
     The purpose of this site is to share information. Thus, if you have any ideas, thoughts or information that you believe others might benefit from, please e-mail your tip to alex@howtohavegoodsex.com and I  will be sure to include it on either our weekly newsletter or here on the actual website. 
                                                                                    

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last updated April 27, 05